Tell Me Your Story

When some young person approach me for Life Coaching for the first time, I usually tell him/her: “Tell me your story.

You may start from the beginning and you can take your time, no matter even if it takes 20 or 30 minutes. I may ask you a few questions if I feel something I need to know more, and everything you say will be confidential between us.

Then, when you’re finished, I’ll tell you my story if you want me to tell.”

This simple exercise has worked with me very well for my mentee to feel relaxed, secured and comfortable.

It will then transform the trajectory of a mentoring relationship because it shows that you as a coach is truly interested in understanding your mentee and his or her journey, not just want to dispense professional advice and make a conversation more of a transaction.

This particular approach of mine gives me knowledge of the person’s past which enables me think deep and help me to make more probing inquiries over time.

Another specific process I tend to follow is when I tell my story, I make sure to describe one or two of the difficult chapters in both my career and personal life, my failure and my recovery from a failure, my success story and some of the incidences from which I couldn’t recovered and still I have moved on.

I try to describe all kinds of anxiety, stress, frustration, and isolation I have experienced at various stages of my life.

This signals that all aspects of our lives are on the table and we are no different from each other in life experiences and challenges.

The difference lies where one of us feel stuck and other has overcome the hurdles.